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How do I get a job with the city???

Man, forget all this other stuff, I want a job with the city. Where else can you report to work, screw up and then get sent home WITH PAY!!! Wow, sit at home watching TV, playing on the computer and napping, And, GETTING PAID AT THE EXACT SAME TIME!!! That is for me! I don't really have any qualifications but since I am going to get paid to sit my butt at home I can tell you I am plenty qualified to do that. How do I sign up??? I'll even drive my own vehicle to the store and stuff instead of asking for and using a city car. See, I am already a better deal than what you have. Can start right a way!!!!!

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