How bullying is handled at Codington Elementary School

It's NOT HANDLED!!

Bullying in school is happening all around us, in schools all over the United States, it is happening everyday to many children and the teachers and principals play it off as "children just playing around." I know this because just last year at Shallotte Middle School my grandson was a victim of bulling and this is how the principal at that time described it to me. "Children will be children and they were just playing around." Well I'm sorry but when someone follows someone around pushing them and calling them names and then throws them on the ground and proceeds to stomp them on the legs and feet, I call that "bullying" along with some other things. If you or I had done that we would have been lawed and probably more than likely, prosocuted. But it was considered "just playing around." My grandson has Asperger's Syndrome and isn't as outspoken or as popular as most kids and this,I think "marks" him as a target for "bullying" from the more popular kids. Some schools have signs up about "bullying" and there is one in his school, but as we all know, that must be there for decoration, because it goes on constantly and most times it is ignored, or when it is brought to the attention of the staff and principal, it is played off. I myself have read many books on the subject and have personally given copies of ways to deal with "bullying" to teachers at my child's meetings. Until the schools understand that "bullying" plays a huge part in a child's ability at school to attend on a regular basis, study and succeed, some children will be "left behind", because teaching a child to read and write is not the only thing that a school should be involved in, but also a child's welfare, while they are attending those schools. Parents can not correct what they do not know is happening and if a school does not address "bullying" as bullying and allows it to continue without admitting that to the child and the child's parents, how can it ever be corrected. Bullying is not "playing around", it's not "kids being kids", it is a form of abuse, and no child should have to experience it.

At the average age of 30 something, I still have scars from lets put it straight of being verbally abused in school. I went to school with a physical disability that was partially corrected. During the time of correctional phase, I was tormented by name calling and some physical abuse. With drew from my peers to the point if I see them on the street now I will go out of my way to avoid them. If I am forced in to contact with them, I remind them of just what I think. My son now is attending school with a physical birth defect. However, I am greatful for the teachers at RPP and their ability to handle these situations. It seems the inner city schools have a hard time getting a grip on this situation. Parents need to be held accountable for thier children and thier behavior. My kids where taught from the beginning that this is unacceptable behavior, and it has led to my oldest child starting a "NO BULLYING" peer chat group to stop the violence. So I have been in your shoes and it stinks. I wish your son all the best.

Ok, I'm not all the horribly old, but when I was in school I seem to remember something called taking up for yourself and not involving the judicial system. Why don't partents simply teach their children to fight back because there are going to be bullies throughout life and at some point you have to take up for yourself without whining to the law. Now granted I will agree that if it gets to a certain point or degree that any sensible person is going to seek help, but teasing, pushing, shoving is normal childhood behavior.

Half the time the child bullying is another teachers child, or a friend of the teacher's child so nothing is done or the teacher just has a favorite. But what is happening to my child is assualt it is past bullying still I cannot get help. My child is smaller than other kids and weaker because of a disiability. And he ended up with a broken leg from two other children nothig was done(virgina williamson Elementary)in brunswick county. The principle said because my child said so don't make it so. now my child is in south middle 2 different children again are assulting my child and again nothing is being done. I was told they didn't see it they can't do anything. But when my child retaleated with words my child was wrote up. Its pretty bad when the kid being assaulted is the one in trouble..I also have asked for help with testing and i was told thats not there job to get it done its mine. for 3 years now. the state is finally helping me with the testing. The state also told me it is the schools job to do the testing not mine. We are forced to send our kids to school were they are not protected. we should be allowed to press neglect charges on the teachers and principles.

Unfortunately, school bullying is on the rise across the country, and I thought you might like to know about my book Hot Issues, Cool Choices: Facing Bullies, Peer Pressure, Popularity, and Put-Downs which is a collection of 26 stories depicting various forms of bullying with thought questions following each story. All the stories are based on true experiences related to me by students during my school visits and they facilitate great classroom discussions and opportunities for role-playing.

First off, we need to eliminate the word "bullying" and call it what it is: Abuse. You don't call what a spouse does to another spouse "bullying". You call it "abuse". You don't call the repeated demeaning verbal attacks of a Parent against a child or the excessive physical beatings of a Parent against a child "bullying". You call it "abuse". We have so many different ways to say "abuse" that it tends to not be seen in the same light. A gang of kids in a neighborhood attack one kid, we either downplay it as "bullying" or we call it "criminal assault" or even "gang violence". Usually, it depends on the age of the attackers. But the attack is still violent. Secondly, abuse leads to one or more five major results. It does not take an expert to know this. Repeated abuse (and this encompasses any one or more forms of abuse: verbal, mental, physical, and/or sexual) can lead to: suicide (or at least physical harm to one's self) becoming long term or premanently submissive and being an abuse victim for the rest of their life Will take the abuse silently but will not be affected by it negatively and will not respond to it. Will stand up to the abuser either verbally or physically as needed, including reporting it or striking back ONLY against the abuser and only in self defense. Stands up to the abuser and takes on the role of abuser themselves, not only against their own abuser but against others, deciding to never be a victim but rather the dominate one themselves. We all would like to believe that after even the earliest abuses in elementary school, children will walk away with the 3rd or 4th option. But that doesn't happen. And only an ignorant person would believe that abusing another person in an effort to "train" them to become like the 3rd or 4th type is a positive treatment of that person. Thirdly, we know there are those who actually believe that abuse, especially against chidlren, is a good, moral, act. We saw that last summer when certain religious groups and individuals wrote about and even openly opposed an Anti-Abuse (Anti-Bullying) law in the NC legislature. That proposed law was blocked because individuals believe that it is their Right under the US Constitutional to verball, mentally, phsyically, and/or sexually abuse even children because of preceived sexuality differences. They believe their religious beliefs of abuse against children are "moral" and, apparently, so do a number of NC lawmakers. We have also seen on this very site where individuals believe that abuse against individuals based on gender is also acceptable. That should a male, child or adult, be abused and fall into the 2nd or even 1st result catagory as mentioned above, then they are, in effect, less male, "pansies" if you will. This, too, is further evidence that abuse is viewed as acceptable in our society. Finally, there is a great deal more to say on thise issue. For example, I'm not talking about "zero tolerance". Friends who, consentually, tease one another are not "abusing" one another. I'm not suggesting that that should be treated as "abuse". My thoughts are along the same line as the acts of sexual harassment and rape. That is to say, if someone says "no" or "stop", that's where it stops. The act then becomes not a consentual act, but one of "abuse". At the earliest ages, adults, the authority figures, tend to tell children who report that someone is doing something they don't like (it doesn't matter if WE view it as trivial, THEY are bothered by it), that they shouldn't "tattle-tale". While we don't want kids to become OVERLY sensitive, we do, very much, want them to have a sense that they can trust the authority figures should they say "no" or "stop" to someone and thair "attacker" doesn't stop. Would you call a rape victim (adult OR child, male OR female, or whatever group segregation you can come up with) a "tattle tale"? Would you call a domestic violence victim (again, no matter WHAT your segregation of groups may be) a "tattle tale"? Teach them young, be consistant, and they will learn it for life. You won't solve EVERY proplem of abuse, no matter where it originates, with a single solution. But you will decrease future abuse by dealing it a major blow at the earliest stages of life. Andrew

LOL, Nice little man, but we all read what you did to the parents that were attempting to stop this silly little 4th grader without any parental guidance. You know for a fact you did nothing, accused the students and parents of being liars and chose not to address it. Silly little man. Step up to the plate, or step on out. Don't let this school continue to let the junior thugs reign free in your school. The kids deserve better. They are the ones who will be taking care of you after you are retired and too old to wipe your own self of the drivel that comes out of your mouth.