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Only 10 percent of domestic violence cases reported

READ MORE: Only 10 percent of domestic violence cases reported
WILMINGTON -- Statistics show only about 10 percent of domestic violence cases are reported each year. The ones that do get reported are often the toughest to prosecute in a court of law. Many times the victims of domestic violence end up testifying for the person who abused them, making it difficult for prosecutors to put abusers behind bars. It's a domestic violence case that almost turned deadly. "He picked up a seven foot long piece of wood with a nail in sticking out of it," New Hanover County prosecutor Joy Alford said. "He hesitated for a moment then swung and hit her with the nail end and it basically sliced her forehead open in a u-shape across her hair line." Even though the victim in this case could have lost her life at the hands of her boyfriend, Brandice Ward, she defended him. "She stood up in court and essentially argued for the father of her children," Alford said. Alford handles cases like this on a daily basis. Alford says it's all too common for victims to feel sorry for their abusers and asks the court not to punish them. "I think domestic violence cases are the hardest to prosecute," Alford said. "Those and sex offender cases, because in cases like this one, you have a clear victim who often times doesn't come to court or does come to court and testifies on behalf of the defendant." Domestic violence victims' advocates say there are a number of reasons why someone who has been abused would take the side of their attacker, such as fear, having children with the abuser, and psychological issues. "They say 'Oh baby, I love you, I'm so sorry, it will never happen again,' and a lot of times the victim wants to believe that because it is someone they love," One victims' advocate said. Brandice Ward was sentenced last week to three to five years in prison, which was the maximum time allowed under the circumstances. If you are a victim of domestic violence you can seek help from local shelters such as Open Gate in Wilmington.

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Got it now

Doesn't matter now.. He currently will not be able to parole until 2011. He is now property of the NC Dept of Corrections.

It's sad that only 10% of

It's sad that only 10% of domestic violence cases are reported. Last year, I lost my 18 year old sister(Latashia Toomer)to domestic violence. She was gunned down by her boyfriend, her very first boyfriend. There's no excuse because nobody should have the right to take a love ones life, I don't care what the circumstances are. We never knew she was being abused. She was scared. It wasn't until after he killed her that her employees told our family how he was stalking her at her job and a police officer would see her cry everyday. She talked to the officer and told him that the guy wouldn't leave her alone and that day the police officer promised that he would take care of it. Before the shooting he was arrested for carrying a concealed weapon, but some family member bailed him out. In the end it showed how much of a COWARD he was because he killed himself too. On top of that, you know what kind of family he has and how he was brought up if the only thing that his mother can say is he was Depressed. That's B-S because if he was that depressed she should have gotten her son help.As my father said in his interview, "Nobody had the right to take our baby away from us, she was our knee baby".

it is vary sad because if

it is vary sad because if they stood up and said somthing and put the man behinde bars they would realize how better life would be i know this personaly beacuse my mothers boyfreind beat her 1 day when he was drunk and i called the police and he went to jail we went to court and got a restranig order on him but 4 months into it she got it takin of and he was back living in are house and we argue evrey day because i hate him now i left and i saty with m grandmother until he can leave and he is in a week so i cant wait to be with my mom mabey she will relize how better life can be

More details about abuse

There are many reasons why an individual may not report abuse. In addition to the ones mentioned above, authority figures (such as police, doctors, and support organizations) may, for whatever personal reason, may have difficulty believing the victim. It may be the preception the authority figure has about the victim's life style, gender, race, religion, or other factor. People have to realize that even if a person is an authority figure, that doesn't mean they aren't Human, with all the baggage that comes with being a part of the species. Another possibility: Taught from earliest childhood to be a victim. Again, not only because of long existing stereotypes based on gender, race, financial class, etc, but because of how we raise kids to respond to abuse. For example, while there are plenty of organizations which claim to teach kids not to be "bullies" (better known as abusers, and that's not PC, that's reality), authority figures still don't prevent abuse in schools. From "don't be a tattle tale" to "ignore them and they'll stop" all the way to totally ignoring the abuse (look at various articles regarding the recent Cleveland school shooting as to how one kid, who was a long term abuse victim in school decided to act when he'd had enough). Tell me: if you did the same thing to adults that you do to kids when they are abused in school, how do you think the adult will turn out? So why do it to kids? Abuse (verbal, mental, physical, even sexual) at a young age, especially repeated abuse, will affect a child over long periods of time. They may commit suicide, become life long victims (sound familiar?), ignore their abuser but still be strong (and still may or may not trust authority figures), defend themselves violently or non-violently against their abuser without becoming an abuser (and may still get in trouble, thereby not trusting authority figures still), or may become abusers themselves. I understand that some kids like picking at each other in a friendly manner. But if a kid says "stop" or "no"... Think of how you are SUPPOSED to treat that situation as an adult victim of sexual harassment. If the "attacker" doesn't stop, you're supposed to report the person to an authority figure. So, uh, what's so hard to understand that that is what should be done as kids? If you do that when they are kids, they'll trust authority figures later in life too. I know this is a long post, but my point isn't that I'm being PC, but rather, that we teach individuals at the earliest learning points, and they will follow later in life. Teach them not to make false claims, whatever excuse they may think they have. Teach them that they shouldn't hit ANYONE, and that NO ONE has the right to hit them. Teach them that their feelings are as important as everyone else's. Teach them that they can trust authority figures without being laughed at because they can't possibly be a victim because of their race, gender, or other ignorant factor. End abuse for EVERYONE, not just one group or the other, and the act of abuse will end. Andrew

CAROLINA BEACH HAS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CANDIDATE

one of the guys running for mayor was in the island gazette saying he is sorry he beat his wife but he said when he did it, it was because he was poor. POOR? Poor excuse for a man, awful excuse for a candidate is all I got to say. Island Gazette article

Nothing in life is easy

I fully understand the financial, emotional, and physchological pressures abused spouses are under, but unless you want to accept life as a punching bag, help put him (or her) in jail. Suck it up, steel that backbone, and GET OUT! In my entire life, I have never met a formerly abused spouse who thought that they had made a mistake in ending the relationship.

what about another kind of abuse!

what do you do when your ex and his spouse use verbable abuse aganist you. what can you do to stop it. when the courts will not do anything to them. it has been going on for years and i dont know what to do. please comment if you have any info. thanks!!!!

Exactly how do they verbally

Exactly how do they verbally abuse you? Are they calling you, driving by your house, showing up where you work or shop...if they are verbally abusing you, then you must be in some sort of contact with them. This makes a huge difference on what you can do. You can try a restraining order or domestic violence order (50-B). Try changing your phone number. Don't make a habbit of doing the same thing over and over again (ie. shopping on the same days, eating at the same place at the same time...) twist up your daily life

I HAVE NO COMMENT OR

I HAVE NO COMMENT OR RESPONSE TO THE ATTACHED. I WOULD JUST LIKE PEOPLE TO KNOW THAT BEFORE MY BROTHER BRANDICE WARD DID WHAT HE DID TO HIS WIFE NANCY THAT MORNING THERE WERE OTHER THINGS INVOLVED. I DON'T CONDONE WHAT HE DID BUT I DON'T WANT PEOPLE LOOKING AT MY BROTHER AS A MONSTER EITHER. THE NIGHT HE TURNED HIMSELF IN HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT HE HAD DONE.IT WAS LIKE HE HAD BLACKED OUT HE HAD NO IDEA THAT SHE HAD 67 STITCHES. I TALKED TO HIM ON THE PHONE FOR 45 MINUTES TO GET HIM TO TELL ME WHERE HE WAS SO HIS BROTHER COULD BE WITH HIM. HE IS TRULY SORRY FOR WHAT HAPPENED!! HE LOVES HER AND HE NEVER MEANT FOR WHAT HAPPENED TO HAPPEN. AND THE ONES WHO ARE SUFFERING THE MOST ARE THEIR SONS, MY NEPHEWS, AND IF YOU ALL COULD KEEP THEM ALL IN YOUR PRAYERS, WE WOULD APPRECIATE THAT. THANK YOU. WE LOVE YOU BRANDICE AND WILL SEE YOU SOON.

what can i do!

I do have i restraining order! but the phone calls do not stop i have changed my # we have a child together and he has it. they get it from him i have asked an attorney but he says theres nothing i can do. is there someone who knows what to do. he blocks his # and i have the harrasing messages.

Have him arrested

His phone calls are violating his 50B. Call the police and have him arrested, or better yet take your messages and go to the Magistrate's office. You can also call your operator and let her know you had a report taken for harrassment and domestice violence and you want to have the last call traced for the record. A detective or your attorney can get those records for court

Yup

Set your home phone for anonymous call rejection. Then if a caller with a blocked number calls, they get a recording telling them there call has been properly delivered but the called party doesn't wish to take calls from people that block their number. If he is calling your cell phone, don't answer any unknown numbers. Then if he leaves hateful messages, you have them recorded. If you are getting hang up calls or other harassment, as soon as you hang up, pick up and dial *57. That will put a trace on the line. You will not get any info but after you have so many, you can call the police and they can get the records from the phone company.