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State releases domestic violence stats

READ MORE: State releases domestic violence stats
For the first time ever, the state has released statistics on deaths caused by domestic violence. It's an alarming statewide number, and southeastern North Carolina has seen its share. According to the state, 131 people died in North Carolina from a domestic violence murder last year and two of those cases happened right here in our backyard. Out of the 131 domestic violence murders across the state in 2008, 99 of the victims were female and 32 were male; male offenders committed the majority of the crimes. Local domestic violence advocate, Renee McGill-Cox said these statistics prove the problem of domestic violence is real. “That's 131 too many and of course in New Hanover County we had two in ‘08, but it's just too many people who are dying." Locally, 62-year-old Barbara Dickenson died in June, four years after being shot by her husband. Then in August, 27-year-old detention officer Tarica Pulliam was shot outside her home. Her ex-boyfriend, who Pulliam had a protective order against, is believed to have killed her. He killed himself days later. McGill-Cox said what's even more alarming, only 8 out of 131 actually had protective orders against their offenders. Even though they don't always work, she says they're important to have. Filing a protective order or pressing charges against an abuser lowers the chance of continued abuse. Also, seeking help from family and friends or finding a local shelter can also help improve your chances of surviving domestic violence.

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Was Married

I was married to a woman who liked to use the system. I took her to court to get full and total custody of my 2 older children in 1996. She proceeded to trump up charges of abuse and take out protective orders against me. When all of this was over I was found NOT GUILTY of any of the charges I was not aquitted I was found NOT GUILTY and Judge John W. Smith called her a lier in open court and said the charges were false. After that my ex-wife lost custody of the children, had her parental rights stripped from her and pled guilty to child abuse and sexual abuse of a child. You see women do trump up charges and that makes it hard for men and women who are real victims to get anything done because of this.

Violence has been too accepted for too long here

In 1996 I had a room mate threaten to kill me, he destroyed my property and made my life miserable and fear laden. I went to get a restraining order in New Hanover County and was told that seeing we were not a couple who had sex (which is ILLEGAL in this state) that I could not get one. SO, how many of these deaths were for that very reason?

The Light

Orders like these start the paper trail of proof against an abusive Husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner. I would hazzard a guess as to why some Judges don't approve these orders. To many times people use them in a vendictive way with false charges of abuse. This makes it hard I believe for a judge who has seen countless hundreds or even thousands of these papers come across their bench to really figure out the truth. There should be a very stiff penalty against people who file a false charge just because they are mad at someone. I believe this happens on both sides. But I also think it might be a little heavier on the womans side because it's easier to believe a man hitting or asulting a woman than the other way around.

Even if you get a Protective Order,

Even if you get a protective order, they are not worth the paper they are written on. And the statment, " Filing a protective order or pressing charges against an abuser lowers the chance of continued abuse" is not true. A majority of the time a protective order only adds fuel to the fire and the abuser becomes even more dangerous.

So True

That is so true. I had a restraining order when I left my husband. He walked thru it and the deputies just sent him home. Their excuse? "He's very upset and you really need to talk to him". I guess the deputies didn't think a broken neck and back from him was serious enough.

If you have a domestic

If you have a domestic Violence protective order, police have no choice but to arrest the person. Something is fishy in your "scenario." Maybe it happened a long time ago, but for at least the past 10 years, police do not have a choice to arrest or not....THEY HAVE TO

Nothing fishy

his stepmother has friends in the sheriffs dept and was constantly getting him out of trouble.

Just FYI...the victim can

Just FYI...the victim can always see a magistrate and have warrants taken out themself. Leave it up to the courts then you wouldn't have to worry about corrupt LEO. And officer has to arrest someone on warrants or they will lose their job

Protective orders

What happens when a judge will not approve one, even when there are cases of abuse in the past? What does the abuser have to do, attempt to kill the female involved? There needs to be VERY careful consideration when refusing to sign an extension of the order.

Rarely refused,,,,,

Domestic violence protective orders are rearely, if ever refused by a Judge or Magistrate. Just the mere mention of a threat or any form of domestic violence can initiate an order to be processed. As with any legal proceeding, a lawyer should always represent you. However, the person that has the order against them has the opportunity to go to court and protest the order. Only in very rare cases, where there is absolutely no proof of threats or violence can one possibly be dismissed by the Judge. Even then, they are usually upheld as a precaution. The only problem is, the order is only a piece of paper. If someone is destined to kill you, that will not stop them as history has proven many times.