After tragic loss, three local mothers become voices of hope
WILMINGTON, NC (WWAY) — September is Suicide Prevention Month, a time to spread awareness, hope and support.
We met with three moms in a Wilmington based support group to share their story.
“It’s important to be able to reach out and speak to anyone. We are family, we are definitely family,” the moms said.
September is National Suicide Prevention Month and September 8th marks 988 day to raise awareness of the suicide and crisis lifeline.
“We didn’t have that three years ago and now people can reach out, dial that number and there’s someone on that line 24 hours a day that are there to listen, to help, to guide people,” Missy Sumrell said.
That’s Missy Sumrell, one of the moms who is part of the Wilmington support group ‘waiting room’. She lost her son Parker to suicide at just 16.
“He was an eagle scout. He also played baseball. Just an all-around nice kid to everyone,” Sumrell shared.
Beside her is Kelly Smith who lost her son, Gibson, to suicide nearly 10 years ago, when he was 23.
“It came out of nowhere; we had no signs that he was struggling. He was very popular, very social, he had lots of friends, been in lots of great relationships with people,” Smith recalled.
Kim Furtado also lost her son Bryson to suicide at age 20.
“Again, very popular. Was on the homecoming court at New Hanover High School, was a baseball on the Championship team. He was an officer of his fraternity…he was loved by everybody,” Furtado said.
Furtado says her faith has guided her.
“I don’t know how anyone gets through it without faith. We know that our sons they just went on ahead of us to heaven. They’re just there ahead of us waiting for us when we get there one day and they’re just gonna have the biggest hug for us,” Furtado said emotionally.
Through their support group, these mothers have found comfort in each other.
“Knowing that you’re not alone, knowing that someone is walking in your same shoes and you don’t have to go through a day knowing that you’re the only one feeling what you’re feeling,” Smith explained.
Furtado says talking about suicide has become more accepted.
“Stigma for suicide was much worse years ago than it is today and it’s because they’re doing the suicide prevention months and they’re bringing awareness,” Furtado shared.
Smith adds that a month to raise awareness has encouraged more people to show support.
“It’s suicide awareness month so I’m thinking extra of you right now Kelly of what you’re going through, your family, and your loss,” Smith added.
After suffering from a loss, Sumrell says there are two options moving forward.
“As parents, you have two ways, you can either curl up in a fetal position or you can get up and do something every day,” Sumrell said.
The three moms have continued to pay it forward in memory of their kids.
Sumrell has gotten involved in the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and ‘Parker’s Possy’ walks in his honor.
Furtado said her son Bryson was involved in the North Carolina Association for Autistic Children and he loved that job. His family has continued his senior project of ‘Bryson’s Buddies‘ which is a baseball game.
A spokesperson from New Hanover County shared resources related to mental health.
Mental Health & Substance Use Disorder Strategy | New Hanover County, NC
The Waiting Room support group for local moms who have lost a child meets on the second Monday of the month, every other month.
The next meeting is happening on November 10.
Anyone interested in joining can send an email to kimkimfurtado@gmail.com
They’ve compiled a list of a few dozen coping skills. Some include:
- Knowing that my child had a happy life
- Long walks (especially with friends)
- Talking to my child
- Laughter
- Participating in support groups
- Doing things to help others
- Talking to others about our children
- Having established times to cry and sit with the grief rather than ‘putting it on the shelf’
- Meeting with a counselor
- Keeping any kind of journal especially a Gratitude Journal
