Holiday season causes pain and loneliness for some

WILMINGTON, NC (WWAY) -The holiday season is a happy time of year for many but for some this time of year can be a challenge.

It’s the first Christmas Hannah Hoskins will spend without her grandfather Marvin Weber.

“I mean obviously it’s very difficult,” she said. “He lived a long life, so that’s nice.”
Hoskins said despite it all, she remains strong for her family and will cherish the time she will have with them.

“I just really want to be there for my mom and her sisters, my aunts, to make that (Christmas) still special,” she said.

According to experts, the death of a loved one is not the only reason people struggle in the months of November through January, those struggles range from trauma associated with the holiday season to those trying to appear to have it all.

According to Novant Psychologist Kathleen Young, there has been an uptick in the number of patient appointments from last year, around this time.

“The actual experience of the holidays is very different for everybody,” she said. “And for some people, this time of year is a time when memories of past years can be difficult.”

Social media is also fueling the need to keep up with that appearance, and causing some to buy gifts they can’t afford. According to Young, good communication is key.

“I know one of the things people will talk about doing is, instead of focusing on gifts to give, think about, what’s an experience that we can do together?” she said.

Young suggests spending time outdoors or attending free holiday events.

“If you are in a place where you are struggling a lot and you’re feeling alone and you are having thoughts, definitely reach out to somebody,” she said.

According to Hoskins, anyone can be in a place of loneliness or grief, and urges everyone to be kind to one another, including themselves, no matter the season.

“If we’re just a bit more companionate to everyone around us, family or not, that can make it easier for everyone,” she said.

People handle stress, depression, and grief in different ways, according to Young.

She said the medical and professional community wants to assist anyone having a hard time, and adds, there are resources available to those who are struggling.

Useful articles addressing holiday stress, including parental pressure and setting realistic expectations for gift-giving can be found here.

Help is available 24 hours a day in English or Spanish through the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, call or text 988 for crisis counseling, information, or outreach support, all calls are confidential.